I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
ugly people sure do ruin things
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize