we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
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