I think I just saw someone hide a body.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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