I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
