If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
