He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize
