I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
