so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
