dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize