I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize