hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
