Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
