Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
