I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
