I could have mohawked her pubes.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
So much Jack, so little girl.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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