I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize