Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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