I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize