I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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