Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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