After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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