You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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