i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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