Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize
