I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I need a beard to bite.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
