Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
