Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
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He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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