somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
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Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
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I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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