He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
