Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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