if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
