they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
