the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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