She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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