ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
