Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
We are two peas in an std pod
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
