I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
