oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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