i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
