Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
