Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
