love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
