Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Just invented taco cereal.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
