Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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