I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
