Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
