We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize