after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
