I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Can't talk, ducks in the car
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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