Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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